October Newsletter and my life so far
The October newsletter is up! You can read it at http://The October newsletter is up! You can read it at http://zenkitchen.ca/Showcase/Newsletter/tabid/6677/Default.aspx
I can't believe it's October and our last newsletter was in July. I have never felt that my life has flown so fast as it has over the past while. So, it's a miracle that we got the newsletter together in our waking hours but we really had so much to share with our growing community of supporters and friends. Dave's recent tally on our zenkitchen.ca web site had over 1,400 people signed up for our newsletter. All I can say is wow!
I miss writing in the blog and having a life, but that's what happens when you're riding a roller coaster that never ends, or opening a restaurant while filming a national TV show along the way... it's exhilarating but you never know what's coming up around the corner and exhausting at the same time.
Today is my first day off in a very long time it seems and I wanted to be in nature so I thoroughly enjoyed the walk in the woods, though it seemed strange to me that I missed the whole summer and weather in opening the restaurant and can't remember when I last spent some time outdoors. Then, Dave and I went to a movie and dinner, one of our favourite things to do on our Monday nights when we do have them off. Of course, we're talking about the restaurant and food constantly, and taking notes about the dinner and service along the way. But, more in a relaxed and fun way then the constant pressure and rush in the restaurant that leaves us completely wiped every night when we take our weary bodies home around midnight. And by the end of the week of long 14+ hour days of ordering, finances, shopping, scheduling, HR, planning , and dealing with the daily challenges and issues that pop up, we are a totally wiped and a tad cranky with each other.
Sometimes it's a miracle that we're still together through all this, but I feel fortunate to share this whole experience with Dave as I couldn't do this without his love, support and someone who totally understands what we've had to go through and continue go through on a daily basis. If anything, it's brought us closer together. I never in a million years thought we would work together, but like everything with ZenKitchen it just fell together organically.
I didn't know when I would continue with my blog but it's like that closest you want to clean, you never get to it because you think its a big job and where would I start and find the time you think to yourself. But, if you open the door, and just start for a few minutes, you just get into it, and then it happens, and la voila. So here I am again and perhaps I'll continue, perhaps not, I will not make any promises to myself or others, but I do promise every day to take care of myself and pamper myself when I can, which is hard to do sometimes when you are always so busy and rushed, but I guess this is life and real zen in motion. It's ok to have all the time in the world and go for retreats to get or maintain the zen. But how do you maintain the zen and mindfulness in your life when it's been turned upside down and you are constantly running, and in an industry that is notoriously known for being so full of stress, hustle and bustle and not the kindest to the people in it.
I always tell myself each day, after my meditation practice which I must fit in every morning or I don't' feel right and writing which I fit in most days, that all I need to do is be present, in the moment, breathe and that I am perfect the way I am. That's what all the teachings will tell you time and time again, but it's very hard to put into practice. At least, I feel that my meditation practice over the past 15 years or so has helped to keep me peaceful and grounded for the most part, and then when it gets rocky and wavy as it has over the past few months, I hope that this "anchor" will keep me stable and afloat, through all the challenges and exhaustion of the business.
People will often ask me, "so how is it opening the restaurant?" And I most often answer that it's great but it must be like having kids that you've wanted for a long time. It's wonderful, exciting and beautiful, but if you could only have more sleep and not be exhausted all the time, and have more time, then you could enjoy it more. That's exactly how I feel, and I still don't feel that I actually own a restaurant. Every time I walk into the dining room to greet and speak to customers, which I love and keeps me fuelled as I love people and am truly curious about how they came to ZenKitchen and their impressions, I feel like I am walking into another world, a dreamy one, and I can't yet grasp that it's mine, all mine. It just feels like I am walking in a trance like a whirling dirvish.
The other answer I give when people ask is that I never realized that in opening a restaurant I would get very little time to do the things I most love like creating and cooking. My days are full of the administration that are critical to keep the restaurant running, and there is always issues popping up every day that we urgently need to resolve. However, I also know that I am developing patterns, this won't last forever, and we just need to push through this critical opening phase. The great thing is that Dave and I are at the helm together pushing this restaurant through the opening gate every day and running the best race we can until the finish line, which is closing time.
It almost feels like we are putting on a theatre show every night because no matter what happens during the day, the curtains open and the show must go on, and you need to forget about all the stuff that has happened until then and just be as on and present as possible, and present the best food and dining experience to the customer that walks through the door. We've presenting this show now for over 3 1/2 months and the good news and what keeps us motivated is that it's a hit, and we couldn't be happier about that. What could be far worse is being this exhausted and having no one come through the doors, so we appreciate every customer that walks through that door and I try to meet as many people as I can to tell them that. I know that people are surprised to see me when I go to a table and despite the apparent white chef outfit and hat that stand out a bit, they often look up, and say "oh, are you the chef?" or "did you create these dishes?".
I've always felt that is strange that we don't see the people that cook our food in restaurants. Now, I totally understand on one side because they are very busy on the hot line cooking up your food, all hot and stained with food, and usually not in a position to come out in the dining room, or are introverted and don't want to. Despite the TV shows on the Food Networks telling you differently, most of the chefs I've worked with and known have been quite introverted and prefer spending time in the kitchen than talking with people.
On the other hand, I feel that in a normal dinner situation, you go to a person's house and you know who's cooked your food, can ask questions of the person, and there is a more intimate relationship. In most restaurants, you don't know who has cooked your food, you can't ask the kitchen questions about it, and you can't have a dialogue about it.
The part that I always enjoyed with the monthly gourmet dinners I used to hold was the creation of the dinners and going out at the end of the dinners to meet to the people who have come eat my food and answer their questions. And this made sense as part of my philosophy of understanding better our food supply system, from farm to fork, and breaking down the barriers so that people can better understand where their food is coming from, and what is done with it until it reaches your fork.
It does take more time and staffing to come into the dining room, but I don't think I could continue to create and be energized and inspired without this daily interaction with the people who are coming to ZenKitchen to eat my food. I cook from the heart and I cook for people. I am inspired the beautiful produce from our local farms and the world around us. But what probably inspires me most, and Dave as he is a vital part of the creation process too, is what would excite, intrigue and satisfy our customers when they eat our food.
Perhaps this is like my meditation practice and practice in general. Instead of letting the ego guide, who is often like an unruly child at times and very noisy, trying to listen to the quiet but steady heart instead and living a life from love and compassion of others. And food, that critical substance that goes into our bodies and fuels it, should we not be creating things out of love for it? Why do we abuse it so when we are out of time or energy, myself included? Well, on this note of love, I leave to take care of myself and get a good night's sleep after a good day....
I can't believe it's October and our last newsletter was in July. I have never felt that my life has flown so fast as it has over the past while. So, it's a miracle that we got the newsletter together in our waking hours but we really had so much to share with our growing community of supporters and friends. Dave's recent tally on our zenkitchen.ca web site had over 1,400 people signed up for our newsletter. All I can say is wow!
I miss writing in the blog and having a life, but that's what happens when you're riding a roller coaster that never ends, or opening a restaurant while filming a national TV show along the way... it's exhilarating but you never know what's coming up around the corner and exhausting at the same time.
Today is my first day off in a very long time it seems and I wanted to be in nature so I thoroughly enjoyed the walk in the woods, though it seemed strange to me that I missed the whole summer and weather in opening the restaurant and can't remember when I last spent some time outdoors. Then, Dave and I went to a movie and dinner, one of our favourite things to do on our Monday nights when we do have them off. Of course, we're talking about the restaurant and food constantly, and taking notes about the dinner and service along the way. But, more in a relaxed and fun way then the constant pressure and rush in the restaurant that leaves us completely wiped every night when we take our weary bodies home around midnight. And by the end of the week of long 14+ hour days of ordering, finances, shopping, scheduling, HR, planning , and dealing with the daily challenges and issues that pop up, we are a totally wiped and a tad cranky with each other.
Sometimes it's a miracle that we're still together through all this, but I feel fortunate to share this whole experience with Dave as I couldn't do this without his love, support and someone who totally understands what we've had to go through and continue go through on a daily basis. If anything, it's brought us closer together. I never in a million years thought we would work together, but like everything with ZenKitchen it just fell together organically.
I didn't know when I would continue with my blog but it's like that closest you want to clean, you never get to it because you think its a big job and where would I start and find the time you think to yourself. But, if you open the door, and just start for a few minutes, you just get into it, and then it happens, and la voila. So here I am again and perhaps I'll continue, perhaps not, I will not make any promises to myself or others, but I do promise every day to take care of myself and pamper myself when I can, which is hard to do sometimes when you are always so busy and rushed, but I guess this is life and real zen in motion. It's ok to have all the time in the world and go for retreats to get or maintain the zen. But how do you maintain the zen and mindfulness in your life when it's been turned upside down and you are constantly running, and in an industry that is notoriously known for being so full of stress, hustle and bustle and not the kindest to the people in it.
I always tell myself each day, after my meditation practice which I must fit in every morning or I don't' feel right and writing which I fit in most days, that all I need to do is be present, in the moment, breathe and that I am perfect the way I am. That's what all the teachings will tell you time and time again, but it's very hard to put into practice. At least, I feel that my meditation practice over the past 15 years or so has helped to keep me peaceful and grounded for the most part, and then when it gets rocky and wavy as it has over the past few months, I hope that this "anchor" will keep me stable and afloat, through all the challenges and exhaustion of the business.
People will often ask me, "so how is it opening the restaurant?" And I most often answer that it's great but it must be like having kids that you've wanted for a long time. It's wonderful, exciting and beautiful, but if you could only have more sleep and not be exhausted all the time, and have more time, then you could enjoy it more. That's exactly how I feel, and I still don't feel that I actually own a restaurant. Every time I walk into the dining room to greet and speak to customers, which I love and keeps me fuelled as I love people and am truly curious about how they came to ZenKitchen and their impressions, I feel like I am walking into another world, a dreamy one, and I can't yet grasp that it's mine, all mine. It just feels like I am walking in a trance like a whirling dirvish.
The other answer I give when people ask is that I never realized that in opening a restaurant I would get very little time to do the things I most love like creating and cooking. My days are full of the administration that are critical to keep the restaurant running, and there is always issues popping up every day that we urgently need to resolve. However, I also know that I am developing patterns, this won't last forever, and we just need to push through this critical opening phase. The great thing is that Dave and I are at the helm together pushing this restaurant through the opening gate every day and running the best race we can until the finish line, which is closing time.
It almost feels like we are putting on a theatre show every night because no matter what happens during the day, the curtains open and the show must go on, and you need to forget about all the stuff that has happened until then and just be as on and present as possible, and present the best food and dining experience to the customer that walks through the door. We've presenting this show now for over 3 1/2 months and the good news and what keeps us motivated is that it's a hit, and we couldn't be happier about that. What could be far worse is being this exhausted and having no one come through the doors, so we appreciate every customer that walks through that door and I try to meet as many people as I can to tell them that. I know that people are surprised to see me when I go to a table and despite the apparent white chef outfit and hat that stand out a bit, they often look up, and say "oh, are you the chef?" or "did you create these dishes?".
I've always felt that is strange that we don't see the people that cook our food in restaurants. Now, I totally understand on one side because they are very busy on the hot line cooking up your food, all hot and stained with food, and usually not in a position to come out in the dining room, or are introverted and don't want to. Despite the TV shows on the Food Networks telling you differently, most of the chefs I've worked with and known have been quite introverted and prefer spending time in the kitchen than talking with people.
On the other hand, I feel that in a normal dinner situation, you go to a person's house and you know who's cooked your food, can ask questions of the person, and there is a more intimate relationship. In most restaurants, you don't know who has cooked your food, you can't ask the kitchen questions about it, and you can't have a dialogue about it.
The part that I always enjoyed with the monthly gourmet dinners I used to hold was the creation of the dinners and going out at the end of the dinners to meet to the people who have come eat my food and answer their questions. And this made sense as part of my philosophy of understanding better our food supply system, from farm to fork, and breaking down the barriers so that people can better understand where their food is coming from, and what is done with it until it reaches your fork.
It does take more time and staffing to come into the dining room, but I don't think I could continue to create and be energized and inspired without this daily interaction with the people who are coming to ZenKitchen to eat my food. I cook from the heart and I cook for people. I am inspired the beautiful produce from our local farms and the world around us. But what probably inspires me most, and Dave as he is a vital part of the creation process too, is what would excite, intrigue and satisfy our customers when they eat our food.
Perhaps this is like my meditation practice and practice in general. Instead of letting the ego guide, who is often like an unruly child at times and very noisy, trying to listen to the quiet but steady heart instead and living a life from love and compassion of others. And food, that critical substance that goes into our bodies and fuels it, should we not be creating things out of love for it? Why do we abuse it so when we are out of time or energy, myself included? Well, on this note of love, I leave to take care of myself and get a good night's sleep after a good day....
posted by Caroline at 9:31 PM
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